Thursday, August 9, 2012

What an ordinary web you weave

The Amazing Spider-man. With a movie like this I cannot help asking why? Why did they feel a need to rehash this story? Why did they choose to rehash this with an extra dorky version of Peter Parker? Why did they think there was a market for a movie that should still be relatively fresh in your memory (and infinitely better). I would like to think that Spider-man 3 did not exist but unfortunately the horror that is this film still haunts me and should serve as a warning that drugs are bad, 'mkay? The one positive is that at least everyone managed to not get all teary in the grand finale.


From the start, there is a chronic sense of déjà vu. A dorky but smart college student, Peter Parker, attends school and is brought up by his grandparents and is then bitten by a radioactive spider. Yawn. The one cool bit is that he gets back his spider-web-shooter thingies (official scientific term) rather than having spider web shooting out of his wrists. That's one point for science, albeit comic book science. Compared to Raimi's films, the web swinging and snarky New York Spidey repartee is more fun and the effects are better realised. I liked it and at this point I was holding out hope that the rest of the film would only get better. But that is about the time that we are introduced to a very poorly transposed Reptile/Rhys Ifans amalgam that just looks all parts ridiculous and zero parts scary or intimidating. Even the fights are not memorable and the grand finale is just plain boring with little reason to care whichever way the movie chose to fall (the good guys win once again).

Off topic: what is it with modern-day film makers (Raimi and Nolan included)? Why do they have a hard-on for exposing the hero's secret identity to anyone willing to give them the time of day? I don't remember my Spidey being as flippant with his alter ego but maybe this is a warning sign of my impending dementia.

Peter Parker you ain't
It is unfortunate. I think a lot was right with this film although there was not enough to make it good. First and foremost, the story isn't particularly good, The main actor (Andrew Garfield) sort of flounders in the role and the love interest is classic damsel in distress with a hint of girl power but not much purpose outside of trying to look fabulous. Go and watch Sam Raimi's Spider-man and (the most excellent) Spider-man 2 instead. The only thing amazing about this film is the name.