Monday, April 30, 2018

More like god of bore

So, the new God of War is out ... and I am pretty disappointed. In the ever-diminishing world of fantasy and deity genocide, old Kratos has now been afflicted with an annoying boy to torment his misadventures - and he has lost his blades of chaos. Let me say that again: HE HAS LOST HIS BLADES OF CHAOS (actually, they come back later ... but you have an axe for most of the game).

Where once we had the beauty of his balletic, timing-based aggressions:


We now get the stilted throw/power-up axe, wait, dodge, throw/power-up axe 


... and we have boy

This annoying little leech sees fit to attach itself every time you climb up anything. What's the matter? Does boy not know how to climb on his own? And worst of all, this boy is your son and he is used as a counter-point to Kratos' violence with words of reason and understanding. To add to this annoyance, this runt has somehow developed smarts and the ability to read rune symbols - so we have an annoying millennial showing up this lumbering neanderthal's shortcomings. In the first game Kratos killed his family - I'm not really sure why he should stop now. Oh, and by the way, Kratos has now moved onto Norse Gods. I guess this was needed considering he had already murdered all the Greek ones.

Now, I am probably the first to acknowledge that the God of War series has become stale. The third was feeling very long-in-the-tooth and was a chore to get through but that doesn't excuse throwing out the baby with the bath water. Fans of the series will be insulted by this Last of Us vs Thor amalgam. Heck, he even grew a beard (although, interestingly, even in the first one they were toying with him having a full beard). Maybe I'm getting into the nostalgic part of my life but it feels like it's only God of War by name. It's a brand new game repackaged with the God of War branding.

In conclusion: I guess if you love having a small boy writhing sensuously over your frame, answering questions about why you kill all those around you and like playing out your lumber-jack fantasies, then this is the game for you. For myself, I don't believe I'll be playing this and, based upon what I have seen on twitch, my opinion will not be changing any time soon.