Monday, August 21, 2017

Hollowness incorporated

I'm not quite sure how Rogue One got it so wrong. Somehow they made an action film which caused me to seriously question why I had ever been born. When the most charismatic character in the show is a flagrantly gay and sarcastic robot, you know there are problems. The main character is played by 'Soup strainer' as I like to refer to her; an English actress with the most unfortunate set of teeth. She puts the yundun yook girl to shame, much to Mick Jagger's daughter's chagrin.

Image result for rogue one meme

Then we have a collection of nondescript characters, Asian actors (for the sole purpose of marketing in China), a boring plotline (which we already know the punchline) ... and AT-ST's!!! Everyone has a dead expression, with no personality and no sense of urgency to any of their actions. The video review for the previous link (once you get past the bludgeoned joke introduction) aligns horribly well with my views. Where they give it an ehhh, I give it a do not watch. You should not watch this and your life will be all the better for it. In comparison to The Force Awakens, this is terrible. In hindsight I'd rather watch a horrible clone of A New Hope many times over. Now we have the wonderful cash grab Star Wars expansion of the new Adventures of Han Solo which has all signs pointing to it being a great success. I have to wonder what Disney is getting out of this enterprise (outside of money). At what point do they as a company question whether what they are doing is truly of benefit to the general public. At this point all I want Disney to do is bankrupt themselves and all this film ends up doing is making me regret that this franchise was ever created.